Dallas-Fort Worth To Setup Bald Head Polishing Stations

By Fionn mac Cumhaill

Dallas-Fort Worth has announced that they will be building bald head polishing stations throughout the airport.

When asked about the new additions an airport insider said, “Well. God made bald and bald is beautiful, or handsome however you want to term it. I’m bald,” he said and then his ears burned red.

“Yet you wear a rug,” I said. I suspected it was a rug, but he confirmed it.

“One of ironies of the world,” he said.

“Uh. One of the world’s hypocrisies maybe,” I blurted out.

“Says a man with hair. This interview is over. Get the hell out of my office!” He shrieked.

“What’s next, foot washing stations,” I muttered as I quickly left his office. Guys that wear rugs are always so sensitive. How they hold onto wives is a mystery to me.

But, I do get it. Would you rather see a clean and polished bald head or a dull dandruffy one? Dallas-Fort Worth Airport will be filled with shiny bald heads reflecting those overhead artificial lights like the new and obnoxious LEDs in cars these days. Soon they’ll have to have sunglasses huts so people don’t go blind trying to connect their flight.