SpaceX Rocket Slams into the Moon

By Fionn mac Cumhaill

An errant SpaceX rocket slammed into the moon and essentially pink-misted it. Boom. Dust. Suddenly Elon found himself in a pickle.

“What have we done?” Elon said in a command performance with his engineering team.

“What’s this we shit, bro?” His lead engineer said. “We told you if it went up, there was no guarantee it wouldn’t stall out and head straight at the moon.”

“But it wasn’t supposed to decimate it!”

“You know, the rocket hit it in the perfect spot, shattered it like a Tiffany vase,” the engineer said.

“What are we going to do?” Elon said

“A hologram. From our satellite,” a second engineer said.

“How did we have that up there?”

“We thought ahead, of maybe such a scenario playing out,” the lead engineer said

Hot damn! That’s why I pay you guys the big bucks.”

“Speaking on that subject, pal. We’ve been meaning to have a sitdown with you on that. We noticed you pay us $68,845 a year. It’s not even the average income of a household in the US in 2026. It’s a dollar less. What is that about big guy? Huh, Mr. Trillionaire?”

“I do that to motivate you. Don’t read too much into it. Just be glad I’m not Bezos. Hiring robots. Look at all you have accomplished. Wait, guys. ”

“You’re on your own buddy.”