On The Beat- Monday, April 20, 2026 - From Broadway to Biscayne Boulevard, from the Bird Streets to Euclid Avenue to Lark Street- Any Topic is Fair Game Until it is a Bore…

By Mr. Curmudgeon

A wellness check was done on a 91-year old woman and they found her gaming. I hope that is like me when I’m 91… California woman registers her dog to vote claiming she was trying to expose holes in the voting laws but instead faces voter fraud charges… New York Giants trade Dexter Lawrence to the Bengals. Maybe now he’ll stop whining… Mike Vrabel will not be facing a personal conduct disciplinary review per the NFL. He will have enough to deal with at home… Prince William refuses to break his “wall of silence” in regard to brother Harry who isn’t interested in returning to the monarchy… The new season of the dark-comedy, drama “Beef” is out on Netflix. I initially thought it was a show about McDonalds… Las Vegas restaurant owner diverts money from Uber Eats and DoorDash orders into his own account over a three year period stealing an estimated $1 million. If you pick up any newspaper, for the past 1,000 years, and read through it you will read about someone getting caught stealing. And yet, it continues to happen, over and over… 21-inning baseball game between St. Thomas (MN) and Northern Colorado ended unceremoniously on a balk… Life jacket worn by survivor of Titanic disaster auctioned off for $900,000. That just seems wrong… NY Mets organization invited Mandami to Citi Field. They have since lost 11-straight games. That’s like a dog that can sense evil in a passerby on the street… Madison Square Garden, “the World’s Most Famous Arena,” and where I used to work, has been a fixture atop Penn Station since February 11, 1968. Now there are talks of moving the arena to a vacant lot across the street which all New Yorkers but the politicians vehemently oppose. Thankfully, Madison Square Garden owner, James Dolan, also opposes this move. With how little people value tradition these days it will be surprising if it is left alone… Red Sox fans send Cam Schittler death threats in advance of his start at Fenway on Thursday. The same fans that drink Budweiser out of each other’s nasty sneakers. Schitt shrugs it off… Why does Texas RoadHouse smell so good when you drive by?… Is Juan Soto really worth $900 million or should they have shared some of that with Alonso, the better of the two?… The last place Mets’ payroll is around $500 million. The first place Cleveland Guardians payroll is around $80 million. Why is it so fun to troll the Mets?… Kash Patel has sued The Atlantic and reporter Sara Fitzpatrick for $250 million (Chump change for Juan Soto) for a story that his excessive drinking and absences from work is causing a national security risk. I think soon she’ll be eating Ramen for the rest of her mortal life… Tim Cook will step down as Apple CEO and suddenly old charges will be able to fit new phones!… The Onion signs a new deal in attempt to take over Alex Jones’ $1 billion Infowars Media company. The idea of this is giving Jones indigestion… Zebra mussels enthusiastically invading the Colorado River with humans unable to eat them to extinction, or at least a reduction in the population… We present it, you decide…