Navigating Roan Street in the Rain - A Lesson in Civilized Driving
By Greg Evans
JOHNSON CITY, TN - It is no secret that Johnson City is changing. It is rapidly expanding, development everywhere you look, and more taillights than ever before.
This is most noticeable on Roan Street at pretty much any given time of the day or night. Getting from one side to the other, for example, attempting to drop a child off at Science Hill High School, or get to work using this once direct passage, poses a new set of challenges. I call this street Roan Street, but it can be any street in any city or town in America, undergoing a transformation, swollen with a new and expanding populous. Since H.G. Wells people have feared the great alien invasion. Maybe this is it, after all.
I personally juggle this chainsaw every single day. I have grown horse shrieking at fellow Johnson Citians to my own chagrin, as this method, although moderately satisfying, proves feckless.
And for my misbehavior, I have not the least bit of remorse.
Driving on Roan in general, is a rollercoaster that most people pay to ride at places like Bush Gardens and Disney World. We get it for free.
But at no time is it more perilous than when it is raining. That is precisely the time a voice flicks on in people’s mind that says, “speed up.”
This can be treacherous and we often see wrecks along the road. Wrecks typically occur not just from speeding, though that is the number one reason, but also, from two other tendencies. The list is as follows:
1. Driving too fast
2. Tailgating
3. Distracted driving such as texting, watching youtube, eating yesterday’s leftover buffet doggy bag for breakfast, working on your novel, catching up on some sleep before work among others.
Those three challenges, for us as a highly evolved society to overcome, are like quitting smoking, Next to impossible, they are habits. They are so normal and part of our everyday lives we barely even notice we do them. Well, I don’t do them, you do, and I see you doing it, and I get horse yelling at you…and you flip me off for yelling at you.
Aside from the three mentioned solutions for safely navigating Roan Street in the rain, there are several other ways to make traffic smoother, more bearable, safer, even civilized.
Use blinkers. Blinkers are used so infrequently on Roan Street they are on the verge of going extinct. However, it is remarkable how they can help prevent driving mishaps.
Use the left lane to pass. Drive in the right lane and keep the left open for passing while not speeding and tailgating. That idea is far too reasonable to ever be adopted into the driving community. The chance of that happening, is laughable.
If someone wants to merge, let them. Have you ever seen people trying to merge anywhere on Roan Street, and nobody slows down to let them in. Their knuckles white from clenching the steering wheel, eyes bulging, face contorted.
Trying to turn left, anywhere, especially on Roan Street. The same thing happens when you are trying to turn left anywhere, and the car coming toward you, speeds up. Sometimes they even honk and gesture. This practice only occurs on Roan Street and primarily when it is raining. It doesn’t happen anywhere else in the country.
How about the macabre practice of rubbernecking? Cars, backed up for miles and miles, and the reason for this is people coasting slowly past a wreck, regardless of severity, desperately searching for blood, death, and gore. It’s funny how we read about places like the Coliseum of ancient Rome and scoff at those barbarians.